Last birthday before baby

I remember turning 23 so vividly. I was in Italy at the time with my parents. I had just graduated from uni, I had just been dumped from my 4 and a half year relationship and I had been kicked out of my house. I didn't know what was next for me and I felt thoroughly miserable. Turning 23 felt like the universe sticking the knife in a little bit further...I felt sooooooo old! (Ha!)

I decided that the best way to celebrate was to jump off the top of a mountain and paraglide down. It was the best decision I ever made, feeling like my life literaly hung in the balance (a few thin ropes and a large kite) and feeling so close to death made me feel more alive than ever. It made me realise how fragile life is and how lucky we all are to be here.

So fast forward 5 whole years and thanks to my cancer diagnosis I've been forced to come face to face with my own mortality, but believe it or not my 28th birthday wasn't half as depressing. The last 5 years have taught me that growing old is a privilege, not a right and right now I feel very very lucky. I have amazing family and friends. The most amazing and supportive husband and our lives are about to get a hell of a lot more exciting when our little boy arrives.

Right now is all we really have, so I try to practice living in the moment as much as possible and always, always focus on the positives. Some days this is easier said than done and my anxiety starts to kick in. I know it's important to acknowledge these feelings and not bury them, so I take some time out to refresh my batteries.

I've learnt that pretty much everything we worry about in life is temporary and usually pretty trivial. Unfortunately my diagnosis is not and I will live with it for the rest of my life, but is it weird to say that there is a part of me that is a little bit grateful for that? Because it means that for however long I have I am free to live it to the fullest.

My birthday this year was amazing, I was completely spoilt and loved every minute of it! Celebrating with a bump meant that things were a little different this year, I made up for the distinct lack of alcohol by getting two birthday cakes instead! I didn't think I'd be dealing with a cancer diagnosis before the age of 30 but here we are and my birthday was all about celebrating how lucky I feel and getting ready for our next adventure.

I can't even begin to say how excited I already am for next year, when the birthday cake needs to go just a little bit further! :)

Thanks for reading.

Katie xxx