Monday, September 3, 2018

Pregnancy: Expectation V's Reality



I think it's fair to say that I haven't had the most typical pregnancy, however all of that aside (I'm taking five minutes away from cancer talk...because fatigue!) pregnancy is nothing at all how I imagined it would be!

Call me naive but I definitely imagined I'd be able to keep up my usual levels of activity. I was doing alright until around week 6 when all of a sudden I woke up and morning sickness had hit. I was never actually sick but the feeling was pretty constant, like being hungover for 8 weeks straight and of course with all the usual hangover cravings for carbs and melted cheese that follow.Goodbye super food diet of my dreams and celeb inspired baby workouts. It was hello couch and an extra slice of cake for me.

I decided to embrace it and look forward to the promised day when my energy would magically reappear (no such luck since I've just been told I'm now anaemic too!). I distracted myself browsing maternity clothes online and planning my new wardrobe to fit over a perfectly round little bump. In reality how boring are maternity clothes!? I hate dressing my (not so perfect) new shape. I've forced myself to forget about those floaty, ethereal 'phantom' dresses of Instagram and replaced them with....anything as longs as it's super comfy!

It took my bump quite a while to make a proper appearance and for the first 6 months or so I just looked like I'd piled on the pounds and let myself go a little rather than expecting a baby. I'm still waiting for that mythical promised day when a stranger asks me when I'm due, but right now its more strange looks than kindness from strangers. In the meantime now that I've 'popped' it's hello back ache and soar feet!

Also, what the hell is wrong with my head? I can't think straight and I've stopped being able to complete a full sentence. My conversation is pretty limited to, "what's your preferred flavour of Gaviscon?" and, "Oh my god is it hot in here, or is that just me?". I'm getting letters and words in the wrong order, forgetting basic tasks and leaving the tap running for no reason. The other day I went out for a walk and left the back door to our house wide open...Please tell me this is totally normal baby brain and not cancer fog coming back!?

The big one that's really freaked me out is needing the loo all the time. Literally five minutes after I've already been. Unfortunately not something I'm unfamiliar with but god it really does play with your head. I had to check with my doctor at my last appointment that this was definitely just baby dancing all over my bladder and not anything more nasty! He assured me that it all sounded completely normal, but obviously my next cystoscopy should put any actually fears to rest.

I guess I also have pregnancy to thank for the feeling of being repeatedly woken up 3-4 times a night because I've been sick in my own mouth...attractive, I know! The burning feeling of acid dripping back down my throat is not one I think I'll forget for a while. I've decided that it doesn't really matter what I eat any more as this baby's diet is about 75% Gaviscon anyway.

I'll be totally honest though. Even in my lowest moments, when I'm really starting to feel sorry for myself I will get a short, sharp kick in the ribs and I'm reminded that I'm not alone. Me and the little guy are in this together and I couldn't be more happy or more grateful.

Anyone else feeling the same as me and battling through these last few months or absolutely loving every minute of pregnancy, because I'd really appreciate your top tips!

Thanks for reading 

Katie xxx






1 comment:

  1. I had morning sickness and was sick.. Only twice at work tho. But was lucky in later stages no heartburn or back ache... Active bladder definitely. I was told would have discomfort because had grapefruit sized fibroid but it never arose.. When I returned to work clearly not at my best in last month or so.. Some badly worded letters but nothing too serious.

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