What I have not shared is the little bit of anxiety that accompanies each new post. I often worry about how each new blog post will be received. I have in the past contemplated calling an end to writing this blog, for fear that I am sharing too much, but I made a promise to myself when I started that I would not do that.
My most frequent fears are that I will accidentally offend someone with what I say or the way I say it and the second is that people will start to see this as nothing more than attention seeking, which is completely mortifying to me.
The last post that I shared was just another honest update about the ups and downs of living with bladder cancer and was genuinely written during from a place of positivist and acceptance. My recurrence was disappointing to me, but not unexpected and I knew we had a good plan in place to deal with it.
The response I received from this post was completely unexpected and left me totally overwhelmed. I was inundated with so many amazing and lovely messages from so many amazing people and it was completely humbling. So first of all thank you so so much to all of those who got in touch, I'm afraid I didn't really know how to react at the time so apologies if I didn't reply to everyone.
The fact is, it left me feeling incredibly guilty. I felt that I did not deserve such an outpouring when I feel so incredibly lucky in comparison to so many people. I was so worried that my blog had in some way given the wrong impression to people that I asked Tom to re-read it several times to make sure.
So I guess the purpose of this post is just to say how incredibly grateful I am to everyone who reads my blog and even though I am completely and utterly appalling at accepting your kind words, it doesn't mean that I don't appreciate it so much and I am so grateful to everyone who reads my blog and spreads awareness about Bladder Cancer to anyone and everyone!
Thank you so so much :)
Katie xxx
No comments:
Post a Comment